What catches Coraline’s eye at any stage is fascinating.

When she was brand new it was contrasting shadows from the blinds or on the walls, or the white polka dots on my mom’s black dress.

Then it was people’s faces or the trees above us.

Then it was absolutely anything and everything, especially if it was moving.

Then it was anything she could grab and suck on. Then chew on.

Now it’s slight details. Things she can touch and investigate. The ruffles on my shirt. The straps of my tank top as I nurse her. My skin as she grips it in her hand. The carpet as she scratches it. If she can, she will turn it and examine it from different ways. Let it fall through her hands, squeeze it, scratch it. Lastly she will lick it or chew on it if she can, but only once she has studied it thoroughly.

Yesterday she tried licking the wood floor. We intervened, it hasn’t been cleaned recently enough!



My daughter was born with pink eyelids. It’s no big deal, normal even. Originally it looked just like eyeshadow – I felt like some people even thought I had put it on from the way they asked.

Then it became what seemed like cradle cap or eczema on both eyes. Slowly one faded, both in color and flaking skin.

I don’t care what people think about most things, but sometimes it makes me sad that they immediately notice and call attention to my child’s bright pink and flaking eyelid. Now it pops out at me when I look at some photos of her.

I had one cashier mention it because he said he gets similar things on his face and he was concerned she’d have to face the same comments that he gets for it.

Why can’t people keep their mouths shut? Who cares what is on my child’s face? I see imperfections on people, but it doesn’t matter. You don’t have to comment on it. What about her beautiful smile as she’s trying to engage you? If you were a close friend and were concerned it would be fine since you know my whole child for who she is, but not complete strangers.

Nap battles

Coraline doesn’t like being left alone in her crib for a nap. We usually take turns trying to put her pacifier in until she stops shrieking. She eventually will quiet down, but we can’t always be certain she will sleep! She likes naps, but not the loneliness. The time change has made it harder, too.

Even through the tears, sometimes the person who goes in to help her will get an adorable smile. My kid is so silly. It almost works. I’m almost tempted to pick her up and hold her tight!

My little sunshine

Day light savings have helped with Coraline’s naps, but it seems to be harder for the parents. I woke up tired and grumpy this morning to take her to her appointment, but spending any time with her really brightened my day! Her chatter and curiosity and little smiles made it impossible not to smile.

Social babe

We are considering bringing her into the nursery for the second half of church now that Coraline spends the first half of church being great and sweet, and the second half wild and shouting out to every one and everything. She just wants to talk and wiggle and look around.

When she’s at the grandparents and her aunt is trying to watch TV she’s been known to shout over the tv and make it difficult for anyone to listen to what’s being said. She just loves to talk.

The other day Tia R and Daddy J were talking about something that bothered them while Coraline and I listened. Coraline found it to be a lot of fun and was grinning and shouting along with them to the point where I couldn’t hear parts of the conversation enough to take part as well!

She’s started saying “hi” back when we say hi to her. It’s adorable. So we show up at the grandparents and it’s “hey” and “hi” all around. Otherwise it is just a bunch of “oohhh, OOO! gah, eeeee!”

She does understand “kiss kiss,” especially when grandma says it. Sometimes she will smile sweetly and tilt her head toward someone’s face when they say it. Once she even gave grandma a very clear kiss too.

Independent play

It’s so great how independent Coraline has gotten. I used to struggle to keep her happy when I was getting ready in the morning or when I had to get us out the door, or i would just ignore the screaming, but today I strapped her in her car seat and dropped toys and a pacifier on her and I found her like this.

She had put the pacifier in her mouth on her own and was banging the insect toy around. It’s short-term, but what a relief it is to finally have the ability to get something done!

Many roles

I want to be able to care for my child in the way I see is best, but with so many roles to play it is challenging.

Somehow maintaining the ability to still breastfeed while volunteering in order to complete my masters project, work, attend class, keep the house clean, sort and get rid of clothing and toys and materials as my child sprouts up so fast, keep everyone fed and actually go to the store is difficult. I’ve done this before, where I had too much going on, but now I have a child and milk supply to maintain so it’s a whole new level of things to carry, places to be, and schedules to figure out.

Pumping is incredibly difficult to manage. I could do it in the car, but it’s challenging to do while navigating the chaotic traffic, or when I arrive and just be late every day to class. I could do it at work, but how do I take time away from an active 12 year old?

I could do it at school or at the coffee shop where I’m working on assignments, but do I pack everything up and go to the car for a 15-20 minute pumping session and come back?

Or do I just go to the dirty bathroom and carry two bags everywhere?

Or do I use a smaller, portable manual pump for only 5-10 minutes that does the job minimally and just hope it’s enough?

Or do I give up on pumping until I can get home every day, then risk losing the ability to sustain my child on it and just accept that formula is a part of life now?